Friday, April 29, 2011

Back to Life. Back to Reality.

It feels like someone is sitting on my chest.

My breathing is fast and shallow, my jaw feels creaky, and my fingers and toes are starting to tingle.

The panic just crept up on me.

I didn’t even realize my stress level was edging towards extremity-numbing proportions until it was too late. Deep breathing won’t even slow this thing down; that’s like a tranquilizer dart bouncing off the skin of a charging rhino.
Ain't nothing gonna break his stride.
Work starts on Monday: a new job with new people and new responsibilities in a new industry. I’m OD’ing on “new.”

It’s been almost nine years since I started my last new job. I panicked then, too.

Of the three people in the casting office, I was the only one there for my first day. But – unfortunately – I wasn’t alone. Someone sat next to me, training me: the girl who was fired so I could take her job.


She didn’t even show me where the bathrooms were.

I couldn’t really blame her.

But Monday will be wall-to-wall corporate orientation. Insurance. Harassment. Honesty. Surely they’ll cover bathroom locations along with the emergency exits?
The most important thing I'll learn in orientation?
Meantime, I’ll keep breathing. I might even use the same peaceful image that proved so handy while attempting to breathe during childbirth. 

Ahh. Snorkeling in Hawaii. Good times.
Gotta go back to Poipu Beach.
via Alexandre Mineev's flickr.
Which reminds me: what is that vacation policy again?


Rachel said...

Good luck with your new job! I hope it goes well!!

AlliBama said...

GOOD LUCK!! No sweat, right?! I just recently started mine, as well. Just remember - No matter how scary/stressful the first few days, maybe even week(s) may be, it will only get easier. Hope it goes well! :)

Kate said...

Thanks, guys! Tomorrow is orientation, but the actual job starts Monday. I've developed an eye twitch.